A Day in the Childhood of Jeff: Living with a Bipolar Mother

A group of brothers comes home from school to a mother who seems caring and attentive. After going outside to play, their mother calls them inside to have a snack. When they come in there is a change in the mother. She is no longer caring and attentive, but is yelling at the youngest for having a dirty shirt. The mother’s rage becomes so intense that she locks herself in her room, threatening the young child until he is terrified of what may happen to him. This is the life of some children growing up with a bipolar parent. For Jeff, a 23 year old successful mechanic, this would be a good day relative to his daily life growing up.

Bipolar disorder is another name for manic depression. People suffering from bipolar disorder have drastic mood swings, which go from very low depressions to very highs where they feel extremely happy (Maya Clinic Staff). Jeff’s mother was not only diagnosed with bipolar disorder, but also had brain tumors that had to be operated on. During the surgery there were complications that may have made her bipolar disorder worse. His mother also suffered from alcoholism, which is well known as a major factor in child abuse.

It is impossible to truly understand what Jeff has gone through. Although Jeff was the youngest of his mother’s three boys, he dealt with most of the abuse. There were times that his older brother helped his mother abuse him, in order to escape being abused himself. Jeff did not stand up to his mother until he was 13, even though the abuse started when he was a toddler. His mother hid the abuse from his father until Jeff was 16, so his father told him that if he hit his mom there would be severe punishment, and Jeff feared his father, who knew many martial arts, more than he feared his mother.

Although there were many instances where Jeff was abused, there are two that he still remembers as if they happened yesterday. The first time was when he was 13 and his older brother was arrested. His mother was in a manic mood and was under the belief that Jeff was going to hurt her. She took a gun from her room and started walking towards Jeff pointing it at him, ready to shoot. His older brother stabbed his mother in order to save Jeff’s life. When the cops arrived they arrested his older brother, and there were no repercussions for his mother.

A second memory was when he was 16 and his father realized that abuse was occurring and decided to leave his mother. Jeff was playing a computer game and his mother started walking behind him with a butcher knife. Luckily, his father and a friend walked into the house just before his mother attempted to slice his throat. These two separate occurrences led to a large distrust that Jeff has for most people. The fact that his mother attempted to kill him multiple times, and the police never protected him when they were brought into the picture made Jeff realize that he had to look out for himself.

Even after the childhood Jeff was forced to live with, anyone meeting him today would never know. According to a study by Western Psychiatric Institute and Clinic in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania has found that children of parents with bipolar disorder are more likely to have psychiatric disorders than children of mentally healthy parents (Reuters Health, 2010). Jeff does not have any psychiatric disorders. Although had an anger problem growing up, he now has control of his anger. Instead of using anger to deal with issues with people in his life, he distances himself from them. He has grown from the abuse he lived with, and now tries to help others not have to live through the same situations he did.

References

Maya Clinic Staff, Initials. (n.d.). Bipolar disorder. Retrieved from http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/bipolar-disorder/DS00356.

Reuters Health, Initials. (2010, January 28). Kids of bipolar parents at risk for mental woes. Retrieved from http://www.reuters.com/article/2010/01/28/us-bipolar-parents-idUSTRE60R5SM20100128.